Drift Away
by silverduo
Summary: It has been 99 years since Edward has left, 99 years since Bella has joined the Volturi now as Isabella Marie Volturi. And then, all in one unexpected night, she meets the people she never thought she'd see again: the Cullens. EDITED
1. Chapter 1

Drift Away

Twilight fanfic with alternate NM ending. It has been 99 years since Edward has left, 99 years since Bella has joined the Volturi (now as Isabella Marie Volturi). And then, all in one unexpected night, she meets the people she never thought she'd see again: the Cullens.

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**Chapter 1 **

_JANE'S POV_

"Jane!"

The voice echoed along the corridor and bounced off all four walls. I recognised the voice immediately, turning and finding myself face-to-face with the boy.

His dark hair fell across his forehead, his eyes sparkled. They didn't look happy. Even as a vampire, he was very, very handsome among our kind. I curled my lip up at him.

"Alec," I said to my twin brother.

He looked down at me. "Have you seen Isabella?"

"Isabella?" I thought back for a moment. "No, but I think she might be in her room," I replied coolly. He grimaced. "Is something wrong?"

"Training," Alec replied flatly as he started to move past me. I folded my arms as I listened. "She's supposed to be training with Demetri right now."

"It's not like her to be late," I mused. Isabella was always punctual for everything. In fact, she was good at almost everything and everyone knew it, though she never ceased to deny it. She'd joined the elite ranks of the Volturi, alongside Alec and I, after her maximum talents were discovered and the ability to prove herself worthy of it to the three main members of the Volturi, mainly Aro. Aro wasn't simple-minded, but also planned two steps ahead of a situation.

"Exactly." He winked at me one last time before disappearing into the shadows. I sighed and shook my head before heading on my way.

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_BELLA'S POV_

Scars, so many of them.

I examined my arm, once warm and soft, now cold and hard, pale. Now left with all the scars of bite marks. Ever since I'd joined the Volturi, I was always on duty, on missions. I was one of the leaders of the Volturi because of my special vampire reflexes and abilities. Aro always reserved me to finish off the more... _precarious _missions, for lack of better word, the same case for any vampire who possessed rank, like Jane or even Felix.

But, as always, there was a mark that stood out the most. Like the brightest star in the sky. One name: James. I shuddered slightly as dark memories began to resurface, and quickly pushed them down, the same thing I did every time they brought themselves up.

They were too painful to access, even though I'd told myself countless times to forget about the past and move on. Up to now, I wouldn't even let myself think about _them_ ‒ the Cullens. The wound would once again rip open, and it would always be too agonizing to try to stitch it back up again.

I reminded myself that they hadn't wanted me, had left me. That was the part that burned me up the most.

And then there was a knock on the door. It was so soft that had I still been human, I would not have been able to pick it up.

"Come in." I quickly pulled down my sleeve, as if I could hide the scars that permanently marked my life now.

The door pushed open. In one quick blur, Alec was standing in front of me, dressed in a dark cloak. He kneeled down in front of me.

"Isabella," he said. "What are you doing here? Don't you know you're supposed to be training with Demetri now?"

I looked away. "I don't feel like training."

Alec studied my face for a moment. I frowned at him. "What?"

"Nothing," he said, but I could tell he was lying. After so many years to practice, I'd learned to tell when people were hiding something. And of course to master the technique of lying.

"Alec," I said. "Tell me."

He sighed. "I was trying to tell if you were lying to _me_," he confessed finally.

"So what's my face telling you?"

"That you're most probably not."

I rolled my eyes and tried to change the subject. He climbed onto the bed beside me. "So, how did you know I was here ‒ hiding?"

"Jane."

I thought of my best friend fondly. How well she knew me. I felt myself smiling.

Alec grinned. "So, if you don't want to train, what do you want to do?"

His tone implied something with a deeper meaning. I swallowed and turned away.

"Alec…" I whispered, pain lashing within me. I felt him watching me. "Don't. It was a mistake, OK?"

There was a strange silence that passed. I finally turned, not able to stand the quiet. His face was impassive, closed, his eyes hooded. I exhaled softly. He still didn't move.

"I'm sorry," I muttered. I truly felt sorry. It was my fault. Alec and I ‒ we were never meant to be together. Any kind of love I had for Alec was only brotherly affection. That night…

_*Flashback*_

_A rustle of gowns, the turning of golden masks, the handsome cloaks. Chandeliers hung from the ceilings, lighting the room in the most magnificent ways. I could see myself, dressed in the most beautiful plunging silver gown, swirl in it as I moved._

_"Isabella?" _

_I turned. Aro was standing there, in front of a crowd of vampires, dressed in a dark and mysterious cloak that brushed along the floor as gently as a caress. His almost-translucent skin reminded me of a ghost, black hair a deep contrast to his looks. _

_I gaped at him. "You look... stunning, Master," I complimented him._

"_As do you, fair princess," Aro replied, chuckling at my expression. "May I have this dance?"_

_Without waiting for an answer, he swept me onto the dance floor. The ends of my gown trailed behind me. I tried to pull away, I swear I did._

_"__Master," I whispered. "Honestly, I can't dance!"_

"_Oh, Isabella, please don't be modest."_

"_I'm not joking!" I protested. "Please, let's just go have a walk, or something. Anything but _this._" My fingers caressed the golden mask in my hand that I carried as part of my costume tonight, as if it might bring me luck._

"_Ah, but what a waste it would be, my dear! You have certainly made the belle of the ball tonight."_

_If I could've blushed I would, truly, I would. And before I had time to make a witty comeback, Aro led me to the centre and put his arm at my waist. He began twirling me around to the rhythm of the music._

_I was so careful not to trip over my feet that I barely noticed his eyes on me._

_After a few moments, I turned to see him grinning at me. "There, not so bad, is it, Isabella?"_

"_Er… I guess so. I guess I'm just more used to kicking-butt than… um… dancing."_

_He burst into laughter at my choice of words. " 'Kicking-butt'?" he repeated slyly._

_I tucked my long brown hair behind my ear, embarrassed. I looked around to find Felix grinning at me. I quickly looked away._

"_Isabella, you are one truly extraordinary vampire," Aro told me, still chuckling._

_I didn't say anything. As soon as the dance ended, I quickly slipped away. It was dark and peaceful outside… reminding me of, well, the night it happened. The night I pricked my finger, when Jasper had attacked me. And the next thing I knew, they were all after me._

_The darkness, sobs that I'd suppressed for years finally became to much to handle, and I broke down outside in the garden. I honestly hadn't meant for anyone to see me, but Alec had been nearby and he caught me._

"_Bella!" he said, surprised. "Are you all right?"_

Bella.

_Everything __‒__ old memories, laughter, love, family, sounds, came rushing back. I cringed, then tried to run. But Alec was much faster than I was. He reached out in a single motion and grabbed my wrist to stop me, then my arms._

_I struggled, but obviously he was more in control, and I finally gave up. Still holding me by my arms, he coaxed me to sit down on a nearby bench. I complied mechanically, and he sat down beside me. No tears ran down my face._

"_Bella." Alec's voice was gentle. "What happened just now__‒__"_

"_Isabella," I interrupted._

_He looked at me sharply, then shrugged. "All right, Isabella. Are you going to tell me what happened to you earlier?"_

"_I don't feel like talking about it." My voice was tight, and harsher than I'd meant it to be._

_He eyed me warily. "I didn't expect you'd want to."_

_I didn't say anything. I hadn't really told anyone about my human life, just a brief idea. They didn't need to know. And I wasn't planning to do that anytime soon. Not even Jane knew._

_Awkwardly, he moved to put his arm around me to soothe me. It was now that I realized I was still sobbing dryly._

"_It's all right," he told me calmly. "Shhhh __‒__ it's all right."_

_All the comfort __‒__ or maybe even understanding __‒__ that I needed was finally here, and I gave up trying and just let go. I slinked into Alec's arms. He smoothed my hair gently from my face._

_Then __‒__ somehow, suddenly, I didn't know how it happened, but when I looked up, our lips met, for the briefest moment. I felt him pull back suddenly, with an intake of breath. Even though I knew he was no Edward, the powerful urge to love and be loved again overwhelmed me so much that I reached up and dragged him back down, and suddenly we were kissing again._

_*End of Flashback*_

"Alec," I said now. I was so tired, suddenly, and felt the consequences of my stupid actions. I hated myself so much, hated myself for even existing. I wrapped my arms around myself, watching Alec quietly. It would surely take him a while to absorb all this, I knew.

He didn't say anything, just reached out and wrapped me in his arms tightly, hugging me against him. It was comforting. "It's all right," he finally said. "Don't be sorry, Isabella. Never be."

After Alec left, something in me lost it. I decided I needed to get the hell out of my room. To where, I didn't know, but not here.

I inched open the door and slipped passed some of the wives walking past.

"Isabella?" one of them said.

I blinked, searching for the person. It was Rayna, one of the member of the guard's wives. Her cloak rustled on the marble floor, dark eyes flashing once in awhile. A golden bangle sparkled at her wrist. I felt my heart constrict at how beautiful she was; even as a vampire, there was hardly any change to the way I looked.

"You missed training this morning," she simply stated. Seeing the blank look on my face, she added, "Aro said."

"Oh, right." I shook my head.

"Isabella, what is wrong?" I inhaled her magnificent perfumed scent. She reached out and touched my arm, concern flashing in her eyes.

"I'm fine," I said, shrugging her arm off lightly. The feeling had yet to be erased. "I just need some time to be by myself."

She looked me dead in the eye. Her motherly expression was back on, reminding me of… well, no need to be said who. I could tell she wanted to know more, but respected my privacy. "Well… all right, then. But honey, if you ever need to talk to anyone, you know I'm always here." Her tone was gentle.

I knew I wouldn't, but out of politeness, I said, "Thanks."

"Look after yourself, Isabella," she said finally.

"I will."

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_Please review! I love reviews, short or long, or just thoughts and suggestions. That's one of the things that makes or breaks a writer: the opinions of the readers. This is my first story, so please be easy on me! :D_

_~Silverduo_


	2. Chapter 2

Drift Away

Twilight fanfic with alternate NM ending. It has been 99 years since Edward has left, 99 years since Bella has joined the Volturi (now as Isabella Marie Volturi). And then, all in one unexpected night, she meets the people she never thought she'd see again: the Cullens.

_Hello, readers! It's me, Silverduo, and I'm back! :) No, I'm not dead. Just... busy. With exams, music classes, tuition, homework, school... (the list goes on). But chapter 2 is finally here, though. Enjoy! And review, please! It'd really make this chick's day. :D I hope to respond to every review I receive, answer questions, etc., but while taking time of fanfic, I've forgotten... to which I've responded to and which not. So I'm going to do it again. :D_

_****__twilightfan213:_ Thanks! Here's chapter 2 dedicated to you, my wonderful reader. :)

_**love55:** I hope you enjoy chapter 2 as well!_

___**sprazinko: **__Thanks for the awesome review!_

___**r0xi: **__I love Alec, too. :D I mean, c'mon, he's so good-looking and all, PLUS his powers are so cool. *swoons* LOL_

___**ShylyOutgoing**__: Yay! Thanks._

___**ilseGomez: **__I love it too! (Don't mean to sound boastful, but yeah...) :P_

___**: **__thanks for the review! It really brightened up my day._

___**Emmauk26**__: Thanks for the positive comments! I hope you enjoy chapter 2 too. _

___**barcelona crow vampgirl: **__Wow! Creative profile name :D Thanks for reviewing, btw!_

___**fightforpeace:**__ thanks so much for reviewing! :)_

___**MrSxCulLen: **__So... looks like I took your advice. :DDD_

___**Volturi-lover-101:**__ Thanks for the great feedback! It's motivating._

___**xsarahx: **__Hi! My name's Sarah, too. ;D Thanks for the comment! I love you so much._

So here goes chapter 2...

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**Chapter 2**

_JANE'S POV_

I spotted Isabella sneaking along the corridor. I frowned, wondering what she was up to this time. She was so preoccupied with looking around that she missed my form.

"Isabella?" I hissed.

She jumped a little and her eyes quickly detected me. She relaxed slightly ‒ _very _slightly. "Oh, hey Jane."

"You missed training," I informed her. I did not like to waste time. Many thought I was rude, but the real reason was that I always went straight to the point.

"I know."

"Alec's looking for you."

"I already spoke to him."

OK, that last one was a little unexpected. "What are you doing out here, then?"

Bella bit her lip, her expression suddenly sad. Guilty, even. She glanced down, unable to meet my gaze anymore. "Jane, I…" she began, then trailed off.

I leaned against the wall, arms folded against my chest, waiting impatiently. I'd never had much tolerance, and something was up with Bella. I could tell. Being her best friend and all. "Bella, you _know _you can tell me anything, right?"

She jumped at the sound of my voice. Her expression was withdrawn, her eyes conflicted. "Thanks, Jane. I really appreciate that. But I ‒ I have to go."

Honestly, I wanted to punch her sometimes. I watched her go, skirt swishing at the knees. Then it hit me. That dang Cullen family, especially the stupid Cullen boy. It was all _their _fault. Rage consumed me so much so I wanted to kill them, burn them ‒ every single one of them.

And trust me, no one wants to get on me, Jane Volturi's bad side. _Particularly _a pissed-off Jane Volturi.

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DEMETRI'S POV

I leaned against the wall, legs crossed, as I waited for Isabella to show. She'd missed practice before, but never more than once a time. Today, I expected both an explanation and attendance from her.

She drifted into the training room a minute and twenty seconds later. She took in my expression upon entering and glanced away.

"You owe me an explanation, Isabella," I told her, deadpan.

"I was… busy," she lied, most unconvincingly.

I continued, ignoring her. "Not only did you miss practice yesterday, you didn't mention it either." A pause, then I sighed. "I'm going to let that slide. Just… try not to let that happen again."

Isabella nodded, looking relieved. "It won't. Forgive me, Master."

We began our usual training then. Some intense sparring and workout, attack and defend techniques and most importantly, training based on her abilities. As human, Aro had already seen what she could do, what with the mental barricade of her's. She could block out ‒ at least, mentally ‒ any mental attacks, making her immune to all Jane's, Alec's and Aro's abilities used against her. Not until was she transformed did Aro realize her complete potential ‒ that under the proper guidance, it was possible her ability to create an invincible mental shield could stretch to mind control.

As time foretold, her abilities weren't unlimited or usable to full expansion. It exhausted her, even using it for a little while. Isabella wasn't fond of using it, the mere thought violating people's personal self-will, but Aro insisted, and she finally broke. We all knew she was disappointed she hadn't inherited reading minds or predicting the future like the Cullens.

Forty-five minutes afterward, Isabella looked drained. She was pale ‒ side-effects from the mind control, but patiently awaited my afterthoughts on her progress.

"You're getting better," I observed. "You're less drained from practising the mind control now." When the training had first started, she'd almost fainted. "_But_ still overall weak. Unless your opponent's mind is relaxed and opened, which is generally seldom, the chances of gaining entry is from zero to none. Judging by its effectiveness on me, lots of training is still required." I gave her the slight twitch of the lips, indicating a rare smile. "Class dismissed."

"I think I need more blood," Isabella proclaimed as we left the room for the other students to occupy, then immediately did a double take.

I raised an eyebrow. She grimaced at me. "Sorry. The thought still of blood sickens me when I think of it."

I nodded, hiding amusement. We all knew of her repulse of blood during her human years. "You'll get used to it."

She gave me a flat look. When she'd first arrived to Volterra castle to live among the rest of us, her expressions had been more significant, more easy to read, but now it wasn't unusual for her to slip into a façade, shielding her emotions from the rest of us. Like now. "Oh yeah, because if I still haven't, as you put it 'get used to it' after _ninety-nine _years, I'll, again as you say 'get used to it'."

I gave her a wry smile, but didn't comment.

We walked down the hallway and we turned to separate, but then I changed my mind. "I think I need a drink, too," I said, easily catching up to her with easy vampire speed.

She glanced up to give me a small smile. "Come on. Let's go."

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_BELLA'S POV_

My life as a vampire consisted of a half-human half-animal diet. Basically, the only reason I drank human blood was because it had enough nutrients to supply back to my system after practices using the mind control. I wasn't proud of it, but it also doesn't help living with vampires who live on a human diet. In return, I received eyes a reddish-brown, almost orange colour. I'd convinced Jane to start her very own animal blood diet, but she barely stuck two days with it before giving up.

I sniffed the air ‒ almost a fresh mountain-edge smell. I could smell the sweetness of wild flowers, enhanced by vampiric abilities. A few elk nearby ‒ causing my throat to rip just at the smell. Just as I detected a more interesting, complete throat-rippling smell that made my body react to it, I felt Demetri grip my arm.

"Humans nearby," he told me.

He broke into a sprint with me following behind. I was pretty graceful, not in an Alice or Jane way, but in my own. I felt my heart ache at the thought. Maybe if _he _had seen me run, in an almost powerful, gazelle-like way…

_No_. I shook my head, pushing the thoughts away.

"There," Demetri's voice said, pulling me back to the present. "Four of them ‒ a family. Perfect."

The idea repulsed me, but I knew I had little choice. To stay in tip top shape, I needed human blood ‒ or at least a little, anyway.

Our work was anything but messy, and soon they were fast asleep against the tree trunk with no memory to spare them a hint or clue as to what had happened.

I ignored the guilt that plunged through my stomach, watching the two kids we'd drank from now sleeping soundly.

I wasn't a Cullen anymore.

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About a week later, I was summoned into Aro's throne room. He didn't look happy ‒ merely tired and frustrated, a look that seemed almost comical on his paper-like skin.

I wasn't the only one. Jane and Alec, the twins, were called in, too. They had as as much idea as I had on what was going on.

The throne room was still as exquisite as I remembered it (I had barely entered before) ‒ almost empty, consisting of three wooden chairs, spaced out unevenly away from each other up against the curving stone-like walls of the room. On them sat Aro, Marcus and Caius, the three heads of the Volturi clan. Vampire guards filled the edge of the room, blending into the darkness.

"Dear ones," Aro greeted us. Since I was changed, he remained one of the closest to me as a father.

Jane and I curtseyed, Alec bowing as we placed ourselves in the centre of the room, directly under Aro's, Marcus's and Caius's gaze.

"What is it, Master?" Alec asked. He was the person I'd been avoiding ever since our conversation, and I wasn't fond of it. I missed him, loved him, but only the words 'brother' and 'friend' summed up my point of relationship with him. Guilt coursed through me.

"There has, unfortunately, been an newborn attack up near Seattle, Washington ‒" He paused after a short glance at me where I stood frozen before continuing, "‒ almost to the point of eighteen victims, all of which drained of blood.

"Their work has been sloppy and detectable, and as to who is responsible for these newborns, it is still unknown. However, it is predicted that almost thirteen newborns are involved, possibly including their creator."

_Thirteen. _There were thirteen newborns out on the lose, bloodlust uncontrolled. It was almost insane to think about. One or two was coincidence, but thirteen was an entirely different story. At least, _around_ thirteen was. There was a purpose of the doing, a reason. No dozen of vampires could emerge at accident. And being new, I knew how it felt like. The unease, the trust, was different.

A pang hit my chest as I quietly remembered the beginning of my new life. These vampires were rogue, uncontrollable - too many to look out all at once. Once, they'd been humans, humans with a purpose in life. To think of them - their families, friends, relatives, as well, to just vanish one day, without a trace. A tragedy to their family, tears to be shed and hearts broken, yet they, once changed, would no longer remember them. And even then, any love once had would be gone, so what was the difference?

And while they were out on the lose - diminishing their thirst, they were taking innocent lives with not a second thought - their families would be left mourning over the lost of them, not knowing the evil they'd been changed.

And who was I to talk? I'd once abandoned my family as well, left them mourning, thinking I was dead or gone, or perhaps even kidnapped. I was so selfish myself, selfish beyond words. And Charlie, what I must have done to him with my departure - _No! _I would not dwell on my past mistakes, reliving the agony once again. But I still could not ignore the fact that told me in my mind I was no different compared to a newborn.

Jane's high-pitched soprano voice broke through my thoughts. "So that's where we come in," she said, not as a question, but a statement.

Aro's eyes lit approvingly. "Exactly," he said. "They need to be stopped. If not, we are in a dangerous position where the humans learn of our existance, which is something which we must _never _allow.

"You three are being sent there to finish the job," he finished, satisfied. "To wipe them all out as if they never existed. With all of you, this _problem _can be dealt with in no time." He said it like it was a dirty word.

Jane smiled a smile so beatific that all of a sudden, she didn't look anything like a vampire, or any creature of the dark, but an angel. "Consider it done, Master," she said.

"When do we leave, Master?" I broke in. It was not the time to dwell on sorrows, but to put a stop to the creases on an smooth cloth.

"Tonight."

Caius smiled in response to his "brother's" words. He flicked a strand of white hair away from his skin, which was just as papery in texture as Aro's. "Good luck. We delight in your return soon."

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_Yay, everyone! Chapter 2! :D_

_Please review! The green button's just over there... The more the reviews I receive, the faster I update! It's the holidays now, so... up to you guys. Wanna see more? Reviewwwwwwwwww! :D_

_~Silverduo_

_P.S. Just an extra author's note coz everyone's been wondering: The Cullens are coming out in the next chapter! Yesssss! So review :D_


	3. Chapter 3

Drift Away

Twilight fanfic with alternate NM ending. It has been 99 years since Edward has left, 99 years since Bella has joined the Volturi (now as Isabella Marie Volturi). And then, all in one night, she meets the people she thought she'd never see again: The Cullens.

_WOW! That's all I have to say. Twenty-six reviews and only chapter 2? You guys really touch me! I love you all! Here's a word of individual thanks to all my wonderful, gorgeous, intelligent reviewers: (Also, a quick shout-out to everyone who added me into your favourites and alerts.)_

_**happysmiles159:**__ Thank you so-so-so-so much! A girl's best friend is her reviews._

_**Miss-Dimitri-Belikov:**__ First of all, thanks. To answer your question, yes, the Cullens are most indefinitely coming into the story (yippee!) as Edward is one of the main characters here. After all, what is Twilight without the Cullens? __*wink* But Jacob on the other hand… well, let's just say I haven't got anything in store for him yet. I'm not sure if he's going to even appear in my story yet, but if you're up for it, I'll absolutely take that up for consideration._

_**aliben:**__ Wow! Is it me, or does everyone think Alec is honestly, truly destined for Bella? However, there will definitely be some jealousy and challenges when Edward and Alec meet (I'm all about it!), and I'll try to put in more Alec and Bella scenes, if you like._

_**RosalieH:**__ This chapter is kinda slow, sorry, but be sure to keep track of the next one! __There'll definitely be more action and hopefully some romance inside, too._

_**Jits:**__ This chapter is dedicated to you and all my wonderful readers out there. :P_

_**Katheran:**__ Thanks! I hope you enjoy this chap._

_**barcelona crow girl:**__ You're welcome, girl! __You're a fabulous reviewer and I really wanna say thanks for sticking with me._

_**crazyperson17:**__ Awesome! :D_

_**clary shadows:**__ Thanks Clary! The baby talk totally cracked me up, and randomness is just cool, isn't it? All my friends are made up of randomness. XD I'll definitely check up your story when I have the time… which is pretty much non-existant right now with school and homework and all. __But soon. _

_**Emmauk26:**__ Me too, my awesome reader/reviewer. _

_**look.:**__ Thanks so much._

_**momotwiheart:**__ Glad you like it!_

_**stacey c:**__ cheers and enjoy._

_Enjoy!_

* * *

**Chapter 3**

_ALICE'S POV_

It was almost daylight when we finally finished packing.

I could hear Carlisle and Esme thanking Tanya and her coven downstairs. We'd stationed ourselves in Alaska for four years now together with the Denali coven of six ‒ Irina, Laurent, Carmen, Eleazer, Kate and Tanya herself.

I met with Jasper ‒ my husband, my soulmate, my perfect other half ‒ by the door of the room we'd taken vacancy at. The walls were painted a baby blue colour, as opposed to Rosalie's and Emmetts, our other adopted "brother's" and "sister's" firey red, with a gray carpet.

He saw me as his lithe body leaned against the doorframe, the tips of his beautiful honey-blonde hair grazing his face. I couldn't resist brushing them away.

"Hey," I muttured.

He produced a smile meant for no one but me, making me shiver, and cupped my cheek. For a moment, we just stood like this, enjoying the silence.

"How's Edward holding up?" I finally said.

Jasper sighed, squeezing his eyes shut. "Not so good."

A crash resonated from the hallway, presumably by Edward.

Jasper winced at the sudden wave of emotion. He dropped his hands from my face, looking very tired and very old then, contrasting his physical eighteen-year-old body. "I'm sorry, Alice. I tried, but we also have to understand Forks is a place haunted by memories."

I swallowed my disappointment. "It's fine, Jasper. You can always try again," I said as cheerfully as I could muster myself to, but he wasn't fooled. I didn't think he would be anyway, even if he wasn't a practiced empath with the ability to feel other's emotions and manipulate them.

Something in him cracked then. His face contorted in anguish and his muscles strained. "You don't know what it feels," he murmured, voice empty.

I understood. "Oh, God. Jasper Whitlock Hale," I whispered. I grabbed his face fiercely, forcing him to at me. "_Stop that. _It wasn't your fault."

His jaw clenched and unclenched. "Alice, I could have hurt_ her_. I lost control, when she cut herself, and the blood…" He trailed off.

"… but you didn't," I finished for him. "You didn't, Jasper. End of story."

His eyes hardened abruptly at my words and I swallowed, not feeling so brave all of a sudden. "It wouldn't have been any different if I had, would it?" he snapped, voice rising with each word. "If Edward hadn't been there to stop me, and then there was you…

"But you know what was the worst part, though? The worst part? That everyone was so forgiving, and Carlisle just letting it go. I could have hurt her, _dammit_!" His hand, curled up in a fist, punched the wall. It left a huge dent, leaving fragments of cement fluttering to the ground.

I flinched. Jasper rarely lost control of his emotions. He was, after all, the master of them.

He registered it, my flinch, that is, and suddenly his expression softened into one of pain and guilt, an expression I would recognized anywhere. He bowed his head, and all of a sudden I was crushed against him almost painfully. "Alice… Forgive me ‒ I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to take it all out on you, hurt you," he said, voice barely a whisper now. "Please forgive me."

If I would have cried, I would. All the emotions I'd locked away now threatened to explode itself out of me all at once. "I'm sorry, too," I apologized. "I didn't mean to make you mad either."

The tension left his body and he sagged against me. He felt warm, his body flush against mine. "God knows I will never deserve such an angel as you…" he murmured.

I swelled at his words. He wasn't the kind to express himself a lot, and when he did, it always made the day seem brighter, as cheesy as it sounds.

My mind wondered back to Edward, and I tightened my arms around Jasper's waist, and his fingers ran through my hair almost shakily. It was true that I would never be able to understand what he felt. Just the mere thought of losing Jasper… _No_, I wouldn't even think of it.

* * *

It all began back in the small town of Washington in Forks, a place so scare of people and Sun it made the perfect location for vampires. And a girl. There was always a girl.

Her name was Isabella Marie Swan, better known as just "Bella", and she was human. Not like us vampires, but human. Soft brown eyes, beautiful brown hair, pale skin. And of course, the one to become Edward's first and only love. It was resentment at first sight, when my brother had almost taken her life, at the… _addiction _to her blood.

Bella was the one person whose mind Edward could not penetrate, which, of course, then infuriated his arrogant attitude. The more time he spent with her, the more he realized he couldn't let go of her, that the attachment was formed. Only, it wasn't one sided.

She wasn't dumb, I give you that. The idiotic mutt, of course, had his own hand in it. Always messing with our business. She knew what we were, and the thing that surprised most of us was that she didn't end up running, screaming, like any ordinary human would. But then again, she'd never been ordinary. She simply, calmly, took it in, and that was that.

It not only endangered her life, as a human, but threatened the exposure of our lives as well. Rosalie didn't take it well. Bella thought she hated her. But we all knew it wasn't true, that Rose resented her merely based on the fact that Bella was human.

When the coven of Nomads ‒ consisting of James, Laurent and Victoria ‒ had breezed by and marked her their prey, it became a fight between us and them. Laurent withdrew from the fight to take up permanent residence with the Denali clan in Alaska. James was defeated, but Victoria slipped through our fingers before we could catch her.

Then later in September, the accident when Jasper had almost lost control and taken Bella's blood. It wasn't his fault, what with Bella slicing her finger in the first place and his lack of practice. Just a few more years. Edward, of course, went berserk, and, convinced she was safer rather than among our kind, left. And it was over.

It ended, with a girl, in the small town of Washington in Forks.

A place we were going to visit once again.

* * *

_EDWARD'S POV_

The pain, the agony.

Still raw and fresh, like jagged edges of glass. The torment was even worse than the transformation itself. It was like a hole, never being filled, but simply the emptiness. The hollowness. When I thought of _her_, the pain would settle in first. It was almost a comfort, the balance that kept me from falling, falling, falling. I liked to keep it that way.

But the feeling always left. Then the guilt would come. The waves of it that crushed my world, the force of it, would rip Jasper apart. For leaving my angel, for not coming back, for never being able to tell her how much I loved her. How she was the light to my darkness, the angel to my inner demon, the shooting star to my night.

I would try to hang on to the guilt, because I knew what would come next: the vacantness, the blankness. It was unbearable. So I kept myself in, locked up my emotions, and just laid down. I'd never thanked Carlisle for letting me go when I knew all he wanted was for his oldest son to stop hurting. The others never understood, like Emmett or Jasper ‒ who had never had the choice to leave the reason they ceased to exist. They never had to make the choice: to stay, leaving their soulmates in constant danger, or leaving, for the better good ‒ a clean break ‒ to protect them from who you really where. They never knew, just how important one slip meant, how relieved the feeling would be to stay in that single utter control.

No, they never would. Because they never would have to go through such.

I let an exhalation escape my lips. Why did I even bother to go on with life anymore? Why not just wipe my existance off the face of the Earth?

It was not a question I hadn't pondered earlier before. There had been once I'd considered going to the Volturi, but Alice, with her uber quick future-reading, had seen it and stopped me. Carlisle and Esme had convinced me ‒ at least, for the time being ‒ that I was too valuable to lose. That I was an important part of the family, far more than words could ever express. My death would crush them, and after all those times they had all gone through with me, I couldn't bear to hurt them either.

I returned back to the present at the sharp rasp on my door. It was Alice. She bounced in lithely as if a ballerina, none of her gentle grace lost over the years. But if you looked into her eyes, even the difference in them were unconcealable despite years of practice we had to shield them.

"Edward," she said.

I waited expectantly. Her voice was not happy, but it wasn't her fault.

"You shouldn't have," her soprano voice tinkled, anger inkling her words. "not at Jasper. All he was trying to do for you was a favour."

"I don't need anyone doing me favours," I replied, my voice harder than I meant it to be, but I didn't have the energy to care. Too cold, even.

"Getting angry at him brings nothing ‒ absolutely _nothing, _Edward, dammit. All you bring is pain. Jasper's hurting right now, all because of you."

I snapped. I roared up to my feet in a second, eyes blazing and mind raging with different ways to kill her. "You think this is so easy on me, Alice? Have you ever thought about what it would be like to lose Jasper ‒ to lose the part of you you treasure most? The blinding pain, the torture… anguish… When you feel as if you've nothing left to live for? That your existance is worth nothing more? Every second, every minute you dream of the face you'll never see again? Every moment you had, every piece of emotion you endured that forces you to relive the pain and the past?

_"No. _So _never_ ever will youlecture me on pain and pain, Alice. Because not an inch of you knows anything about pain."

It was so silent you could hear a single pin drop. When the cold, blinding rage finally disappeared, all that was left was the emptiness of my soul. Alice's eyes were sad, as if the pain I felt reflected in her eyes. Quietly, she backed away, almost stumbling ‒ poised vampire. I knew, too late now, that the hurt I caused would take a long time to heal. I'd ripped open a set of wounds I'd never even noticed before, too caught up with the lifetime of guilt I now carried upon my shoulders.

Then she whispered, so softly I could barely catch even with supersonic hearing: "You're wrong, you know, Edward. You're _wrong."_

* * *

More reviews = happy _silverduo_ = faster update. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask! I love curious readers. In fact, why don't we make a mark? Do you think we can make it to 37 reviews, peeps? C'mon! All you have to do is click the green button over there…

~Silverduo.


	4. Note from author

Note from Author

I've had a roll writing Drift Away and Marked, but I don't think I'm going to continue this story again. Reason is that I've simply lost interest in Twilight, but I'm going to keep writing stories. Before I end this, I want to say thank you all my readers and reviewers who've stuck with me through this ride. Without you, I would've never been able to go this far with this.

Loves!

Silverduo


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